Aging Joyfully: Lessons from My Papaw
As April rolls around, my thoughts invariably turn to my maternal grandfather, fondly known as “Papaw”. His birthday, falling on the third of April, marked not just a celebration of existence but also a testament to a life well-lived. Despite being well into his golden years when I came along, Papaw's age was just a number – he embodied a timeless zest for life that left a lasting impression on me.
As I head into my later years, I find myself reflecting on the invaluable lessons passed down by Papaw. His approach to life was a masterclass in embracing the present moment and finding joy in the simple things. Here are a few of the things I've learned from him that I'm taking with me as I journey through life.
Enjoy the Moments
If you asked me to describe my Papaw, I'd probably start by telling you about him sitting on his swing, waving to all the people driving by on the gravel road outside his house. That swing was his happy place, and he'd spend hours out there, just taking life easy. For a man who had worked hard manual labor for most of his life, simply sitting on a swing was a sublime way to enjoy life.
Similarly, Papaw's mischievous antics during our Easter egg hunts remain etched in my memory – his subtle hints guiding us toward hidden treasures, a gleam in his eye as we uncovered each secret stash. Those hunts were always filled with laughter and fun, and Papaw made sure of it!
Papaw found contentment and joy in so many things. He did so by finding being grateful for what he had and by seeking out things that made him happy, like his swing or mischievously helping us find the eggs. (Btw, the egg thing is just between us — my parents still aren’t supposed to know. Shh!)
Embrace Change
Papaw was also rolled with the punches. When he got married in his 30s and became an instant stepfather to his new wife’s children, he didn't bat an eyelid. He welcomed his new family with open arms and a big heart.
Even at the end, when he was diagnosed with terminal cancer, he was truly calm — to the point that my mom (his daughter) didn’t think Papaw had actually heard the diagnosis, so she repeatedly asked if he had heard. Finally, he turned to her with an impish grin and said, “I’m 90 years old. I have to die somehow.”
And that was my Papaw in a nutshell. He understood the situation and embraced it the only way he knew how.
It’s often said that change is the only constant thing in life, and I’ve learned (with Papaw’s help) that when a change presents itself as imminent I might as well embrace it and figure out what I’m going to do about it. It makes life easier, and I waste less energy on trying to make it not happen.
Stay Active
Above everything else, Papaw always found ways to keep himself busy. Whether he was climbing on the roof to fix a shingle, mowing our combined 7 acres, or cooking the best food you’ve ever tasted, he was always doing something. Being of service and being active kept him young so that even though he was in his 70s by the time I realized he had an age, he was always among the “youngest” older people I knew.
I’ve taken this to heart as I start to get older. I’ve tried to find activities that I enjoy doing that can keep me young, and most importantly, I try to ignore my resistance during those times when I don’t want to get off the couch to let the dogs out or to refill my water (or whatever mundane task is trying to help me be less sedentary). When I hear the groan escape my lips, I remind myself that it’s keeping me young, like Papaw.
Final Thoughts
As I look back on the lessons Papaw taught me, I'm filled with gratitude for the time we shared and the wisdom he passed on. His unwavering spirit, marked by a deep appreciation for life's simple joys and an unyielding resilience in the face of adversity, continues to guide me on my own journey of aging joyfully.
Though he may no longer walk beside me, Papaw's spirit lives on in the laughter of shared moments and the warmth of cherished memories. And as I journey onward, I carry his legacy in my heart, ever grateful for the invaluable lessons learned from a man who taught me the true meaning of aging with grace.
Still Have Questions?
If you have more questions that I didn’t address here, based on your specific situation or anything else, please don’t hesitate to ask me. I’d love to see how I could be of service!